He arrived with 2 bulleted pages entitled "Talking Points", so he wouldn't miss anything.
It just seems like it should be easier, if two people are meant for each other.
I can't believe the best thing that ever happened to me wasn't . . .
I thought we could _just live_ and it would work.
On sex, he said it was very hard on him and he's sorry I had to take the fallout of that.
I'm so sorry for the constant comment 'You're no fun.' The first couple times it's funny, but I know it hurt your feelings. I feel like I'm always sticking my foot in my mouth, like when I said something about breaking your hand. I would change those words if I could.
I would like to hold you while falling asleep but I just can't sleep on my back no matter how hard I try. I remember one time I did when I was a kid, with my hands folded, my family said I looked like I was in a coffin.
I realized I didn't understand you, I didn't know what was going on inside. Like that day my mom exploded, I was being taken by surprise. Sometimes I would find out things, but by accident. And I think I should've checked in, asked you every once in a while what you were thinking and what goes on in your head. I remember once I asked a question and you said "wow! you thought of that" and I was so excited. It was like hitting a ball out of the park, connecting just once.
The weight. The elephant in the room.
The comfort of the ice cream after a day of working and sleeping, "the only good thing about that day."
The difficulty, not understanding why it is so difficult to control.
Just because I'm an engineer at work doesn't mean everything is logical to me.
{but there's more}
Relaxing. I don't understand how you relax, if you need to.
I would try to help get things off your list, but there was always more, and then it was time to go to bed.
But I didn't want to sit there and do something else, like read a book, while you were working.
Especially during the week, when there was no rest, then packing up for the weekend, and going all weekend, then coming home and throwing everything inside and doing it all over again.
Climbing.
you will want to climb more. you said 'I need to find a new belayer'.
you'll want to climb harder, and it's mostly men who climb harder, so you'll climb with men.
you being away for the weekend with a man and sharing an intimate experience is something I can not stand.
And I can't ask you to not do it.
Med school is different, even though it would be longer and busier than climbing goals, because climbing is a 'hobby'.
{what do you want?}
Vacations with 3 days of not climbing at the end
More bbqing
More movies
Watching games
Spending time with family, not just because of a birthday
"I thought you deserved an explanation."
"If you ever decide I'm not an idiot and want to climb less, let me know."
